"Women rule the world. It's not really worth fighting because they know what they're doing. Ask Napoleon. Ask Adam. Ask Richard Burton or Richie Sambora. Many a man has crumbled." --- Jon Bon Jovi

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

Over the Edge

Have you ever tried conversing with someone who is more monkey than man? Not literally, of course. I mean in the brains department. It’s really quite trying. It made me feel like I was hopelessly stuck on Planet of the Apes, population two. One ape and me. Hmmm… It would probably have been better if I felt like I was on the movie set of King Kong. At least that would have been somewhat romantic… of the huge and hairy… er… that didn’t sound good… uhh… let’s say, the gigantic simian kind.

 

Anyway, while stuck in the middle of that mindless and mind-numbing (and rather one-sided) conversation (if you can actually call it that), I wondered if I hadn’t seriously lost my mind yet. (And joined the bloody idiot in his little world of empty spaces between the ears… where all the lights are on but nobody’s home… where you’re always a few french fries short of a happy meal… where you’re one beer can short of a six-pack… and where you’re one hysterical laugh away from the funny farm.) After all, I’m not one to actually willingly subject myself to suffering inane chatter and pointless preening without chafing and champing at the bit. (Holy bloody hell! I’m using equine quips! I’m comparing myself to a horse now?! Bollocks! I’ve definitely lost my mind. In fact, I’m starting to miss it now.)

 

This supposedly silly and insignificant exchange with someone I wouldn’t normally spend an inordinate amount of time chatting with has now become a trigger that has successfully tipped me over the edge of reason and sanity. Proof that I am now certifiably mad --- I am now obviously babbling. I have finally, irrevocably fallen off my bloody tree and hit my head on a large protruding jagged rock, which has addled my brain, turned it into soup and mush, and has left me simpering and whimpering in the agonized throes of despair.

 

Ha! NOT!

 

I’m just bored and in need of stimulation. (And do get your heads out of the gutter before I take a knife to your distended yellow bellies and gut you! Not everything has or should have double entendre!) I simply meant mental stimulation. Right. Although… Never mind. *Giving self a quick and rueful shake of the head*

 

Fine. Just bored out of my mind, then. Bugger. Where’s Mr. Darcy when you need him?

10 comments:

  1. I'm here I'm here!!! hahahahahahahahahahaha

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  2. uh... no, i don't think you are THAT mr. darcy.

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  3. i cannot imagine lively, bubbly, sunny SUNNY being bored out of her wits :p anyhu... m sure darcy's on his way to find u :o)

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  4. wut's the double meaning u'd think we (ur faithful readers) wud b thinkn abt?! :p harharhar

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  5. oo nga, antapang ng disclaimer ha! hahahahaha

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  6. This guy darcy always reminds me of that election scandal, for some weird, blasted (perhaps, sick, too) reason.
    What if Darcy were Kingkong? How would you handle that?

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  7. teka, sino'ng kausap mo? si george?
    ay. teka lang. ano bang nangyayari?
    ay.
    ay.

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  8. teka, sino'ng kausap mo? si george?

    how can you even think of him as king kong?! he doesn't have the height! or were you ---horrors!--- insulting mr. darcy's name by associating it with ---i can't even bear thinking it---him?! (and how dare eric associate king kong with mr. darcy! hmp. well, it's a shade better than glenna's idea. double hmp.)

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  9. Kingkong...Darcy...Kingkong...poteyto...potahto...all sounds the same to me.

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